2 years ago… (from 9th Jun 06)

July 27, 2009 at 11:29 pm | In Migrated 20six stuff | Leave a Comment
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thisisalloneword finds himself in a science laboratory with Fox, Matt, and others. They are going to attempt to travel through time. They will go backwards 2 years. I’m not sure if you could call their method of transportation (?) a machine or not. They have to jump into an area of the room that will hold them in a kind of stasis for the time period negative two years. They wont notice the time at all, as soon as they jump into the area they will freeze and a tiny amount of “their time” later they will come out of this stasis and into the time of two years ago.

It will be very cold – wrap up warm

Joe has only a few seconds to go – fox went first and he has disappeared – Joe is trying to locate his beanie hat, he found his scarf a sec ago, but no hat. Ah well, too late, here we go.

He jumps into the area. A second passes (?). he then falls forward onto the floor. It is freezing. Fox is there saying “it works, it works!”. They both wait and Matt’s frozen body appears. Fox says “wait a minute – he’ll stay like that till he falls”.

True, Matt is suspended there and then suddenly falls forward. Weird.

Why is it so cold? it is so cold.

Comment:
Is it cold because it’s in the middle of January? Maybe the area of the room is one of those walk in freezers you get in restaurant kitchens? Hooray! Smileys!
Blog looks much better by the way.

Hindsight of Police Raid no Preparation for Polar Bear Appearance

May 27, 2009 at 11:52 am | In Uncategorized | Leave a Comment
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At some festival thisisalloneword is procuring some medication, some of those legal highs and also to stock up on normal meds, he needs some more of this hand cream that he keeps using, I wonder why? The guy running the store sure knows because he’s been producing these lotions and balms from a list of normal ingredients plus a few abnormal ones, highly addictive ones, which mean that sales of hand cream have been significantly higher of late.
Thisisalloneword will become mixed in with this shady character and very soon he is a part of the great swindle, although not for long because the very next day the store is raided and they all find themselves at the mercy of a corrupt police department – seemingly American – who will pocket takings and close us down. After a brief chase they corner thisisalloneword in a small warehouse room stuffed with counterfeit vinyl records (could this be a dream?) although there are some official ones there too, some valuable ones to boot.
Impending violence from the officials against our hapless wanderer causes something to happen. Something happens.

Two days earlier, maybe two, maybe three, not sure. Head shaken and thoughts checked, dust brushed from clothes, eyes adjusting to light, where is thisisalloneword now? Ah, the confusion of time travel, always clouds memories and tinkers around with your internal workings.
Thisisalloneword is in the store warehouse but back in time, he now has to prepare those working there, people he has never met in the grand time-scale plan of things, for the impending search warrant and legal difficulties. Stashes are moved, money is cleaned, customers are turned away, the word is put out that the place is legit. Customers, addicts, are sent packing with an extra bit of money and a stern ‘do not come back here for days’ speech that should mean they hook up elsewhere.

But who is thisisalloneword? He does not seem to be himself and has not been since his time travelling. He may well have taken over some one else from this episode – some minor character – and this is why his appearance has not caused certain levels of confusion.

Anyway, strategies are playing themselves out and the key players have been told that the raid is inevitable and they do not know how thisisalloneword knows this, and he can not tell them (who would believe him?) but they trust, to an extent. The police have been delayed but they will strike soon, and hard, maybe the preparation and elaborate misdirection has only made things worse, maybe it antagonised them.

Thisisalloneword is now someone else… the boss? And we have a third person, rather than first person view of him. He is older, 60s I think, he is being cornered by the police and so he will fight back, but not yet, first he needs to get to a safe house where there are firearms stashed. Across the park from the warehouse everything starts resembling a Grand Theft Auto game, a large automatic weapon is located and then the camera pan up from a third person view of thisisalloneword to a birds eye view of the city map. The city plan schematics of buildings change colour from grey to yellow to indicate the police closing in, the noose tightening.
There is a way through, but not for long, everything is getting very close, he makes his way through a building, snaking through secret corridors out of windows, across alleyways and courtyards until suddenly he is trapped. Gunfire! He turns and cuts down a few of the enemy but there are a lot of them. Has he been hit? Something has happened; senses are failing…

…the alleyway becomes… softer… we turn from gangster film into Dada farce… thisisalloneword falls and lies down, but not on hard concrete but on a soft belly of a polar bear which sits up suddenly and thisisalloneword is flung upwards landing on the dazed bear again while penguins and other zoo animals begin raining from the sky. So this is how it ends, ey? A fitting ending? A satisfactory conclusion?

the sinking of the titanic

March 27, 2009 at 2:54 pm | In Uncategorized | Leave a Comment
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thisisalloneword (for it is he!) is aboard a sinking ship. I am sure you will be familiar with the vessel, the unsinkable, the titanic.
Perchance you have seen the film – thisisalloneword has not although he is aware of it and maybe he has recounted to you before his tale of misfortune and schadenfreude involving Bournemouth pier… but that will be saved for another time.
How strange to find yourself on the titanic mid-sink. There is a calmness to everything, everyone and even though the ship keels wildly from side to side, remain inside and you barely notice it.
The crew have already departed, buggered off in a life boat and as we curse them they are sat on shore drinking victory champagne and salutatory cocktails.
Most of the women and children are off in boats too, although not all, there are maybe a dozen children left and half as many women – one of whom is none other than Kate Winslet and thisisalloneword has already commenced flirtations and advances – though she is not alone in this despicable behaviour.
Of course, thisisalloneword knows that women and children are the priority but he is also working out his own escape route. Oh, and he best start planning to help his Mum and brother and sister too – where’d they come from?
In the holds he finds empty water-cooler bottles – the ones that you might have at work. He checks that they are well sealed and decides that these would make excellent floatation aids. They should maybe be tied to people who may pass out due to the cold waters but can then be rescued by passing boats later.
He helps a lad of 10 into a waiting life boat, the boy is adamant that he is taking his collection of VHS videos with him. thisisalloneword thinks it would be better if the space that the collection takes up were to be used for another person but the child is stubborn. What are VHS videos doing on the titanic? Weren’t they invented quite a while after? thisisalloneword looks over the titles and says to the lad that such classics as Predator should of course be saved for posterity. The lad seems uncomfortable that thisisalloneword has recognised these items of a different age, almost as if some ruse has been rumbled. Well, has it? Is everyone on the boat from the future? No-one has said anything, thisisalloneword hasn’t told anyone that he’s from 90-odd years in the future – it would be an odd thing to say to people fighting for their lives and might anger them.

useless time travel and a study of tube travel behavior after wine

March 27, 2009 at 12:00 am | In Uncategorized | Leave a Comment
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Time Travel is of course a great idea and yet and yet I can not help thinking that today at 13:40 was a bad example and experience. I had walked downstairs to the cafe to pick up milk and when I started running up the 4 flights of stairs back to work (exercise regime continues…) I looked up at a TV screen and saw it was 12:40 again. I know for a fact that it had already been 12:40 an hour ago because that’s the time that a guy was shadowing  me at work – he was meant to come at 11:30 but was over an hour late.

So what do I do?

I looked through the doors into the office at myself sat there and figured it was a bad idea to go inside.

People often daydream that if they could go back in time they would put right what went wrong or put bets on outcomes of sporting events. What could I do with my extra hour of knowledge? Not a lot. I went outside and sat in the park and then watched myself at 13:25 walk over the road towards an other building at work. I cringed because I looked ridiculous and awkward and horrible. But still I watched. At 13:40 I went back to the 4th floor staircase and after watching myself dissapear to 12:40 I continued work.

Later that day I am drunk and sat on the tube reading Flann O’Brien, listening to dubstep on random and trying to posture somewhere between intelligentsia and fuck you. My suit is tired, the trouser leg ends are worn, undone and scuffed, my shoes are still holding but have never been polished, my shirt is untucked and my head is shaved to a grade 2, but badly. How did I get here? Where do I get off? & what the fuck?

Confusing Mike Tyson (from 23rd Jan 06)

March 22, 2009 at 11:49 am | In Migrated 20six stuff | Leave a Comment
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Few years ago me & Phil are sitting in Dukes (RIP) cafe in Palmers Green, stuffing our cake holes with the best breakfast (that used to be) available to mankind. The front cover of the newspaper shows a photo of Mike Tyson holding up a previous edition of the paper with a story about poor old Frank Bruno going full blown insane.

Discussion begins; wouldn’t it really confuse Mike Tyson if the newspaper he is holding up is in fact the one that we are reading – i.e. the paper shows a picture of MT holding up a paper showing a picture of MT holding up a paper showing a picture of MT holding up a paper showing a picture of MT, etc, etc, etc…

This, I state, would be possible if you had a time machine to take the paper with MT’s photo on it then went back in time and gave him that paper to hold. Therefore you create a perfect cycle of time which would look something like this;

<<<<image lost to the aether of the internet>>>>

Except that 20six is rubbish at the mo and images don’t work.

But I will try later.

OK – is this correct, is it possible, or is Phil right when he says that MT would at one point not be holding the paper with his own face on it?

Comment:

Uh. I think you’re right. I get so far in visulising it, but then my brain farts and I have to start again. But i think you’re right.
Wether it’s possible is another question…

Continuing Problems (from 2nd Aug 04)

February 21, 2009 at 3:07 am | In Migrated 20six stuff | Leave a Comment
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…problems still not ironed out. Hmmm anyhows cheers for the strange appearance Mr Fleming - not sure what you were doing round my Aunties but nevermind. Bit of confusion regarding your time machine but no harm done. I was of the opinion that we would be going back to either 1907 or we would be going back a bit further for some dinosaur activity. Ah well 1981 was OK I guess, I was far too young to remember it the first time round but even so, a strange choice, no?

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